RECENT POSTS • WRITING ARCHIVEBOOKS

If you think you have to “train” men, this is for you

If you think you have to “train” men If you feel glee when you “put him in his place” You will continually end up with men who are submissive to you. Who cast down their eyes when you get angry Who say “I don’t know, what do you think?” to every problem that arises Who shut down when you ask them to speak Who cannot

8 Ways to Increase Your Desire for Sex

If you’ve been with your partner for a while, you might find yourself desiring sex less often. Maybe you’re just super stressed, really busy, or you’ve been spending too much time with your partner… or maybe none of those things are true, but you’re still feeling the lack of desire. Even if you’re single, you might feel like “Hey, where’d my sexual self go?! I

Saying “I don’t know” is a female response to a patriarchal culture

Women say “I don’t know” because we were taught that our own knowing was not allowed. That our own knowing was not enough. We say “I don’t know” because we’ve been so conditioned out of what we truly, deeply desire that we often can’t even access what that is anymore. It becomes impossible to distinguish what we want to say from all the immediate thoughts

Making fun of each other is criticism, and criticism is not love

In my family, we showed our love for one another by making fun of one another. We bonded over making fun of one another. In fact, I learned that “being easy to make fun of” was one of my top-valued qualities. My family told me that my voice was too squeaky and annoying. That I was forgetful and irresponsible. That I was ditzy and “blonde.”

Do you always feel shitty after feeling really good? 5 things that will help

Maybe you’ve had this experience: You got the job. You had the best orgasm of your life. Or you had some huge breakthrough, and moved a lot of energy in some way. You had an incredible high, and felt like you were doing really well. And then… your energy tanked. Suddenly you felt… low. Maybe you got sick, or you felt super sad, or angry, or

You already deserve the things you want

You are worthy because you exist. You are worthy because you are. I’ve been reflecting a lot lately on the individualistic ideals of the Western world. On our meritocracy, which says that we can have anything we want, as long as we work hard enough for it, as long as we prove we deserve it. When we are raised in a particular framework, we view

Creating safety during sex: The moment of Disconnect & the importance of the PAUSE

All too often, women ignore our own desires during sex because our desires feel un-explainable, too complicated, or not worth taking the time to figure out. Even if we don’t consciously believe it, we’ve often absorbed the narratives that our bodies are complex, annoying, and incorrect. Along with our conditioning around our bodies, we’ve often received societal conditioning to be accommodating and pleasing to others.

My thoughts from the past few weeks: racism, privilege, & shadow

The past few weeks have been heavy. A global pandemic plus the biggest civil rights movement in history is not for the faint of heart; there is so much energy in the air that pretty much everyone I speak to feels more tired than usual, more stressed than usual, more anxious than usual. I feel like we as a planet are all vomiting, are throwing

11 Ways to Increase Your Feminine Energy (and What’s Blocking You From It)

WOUND is now open for registration – find out more here. Do you feel like it’s hard for you to drop into your feminine, or like you don’t really know what that means? If so, you aren’t alone. Most women that I talk to feel this way. Our culture rewards masculine energy. We’re encouraged to work hard, get the promotions, sacrifice our pleasure and our

Why I put my naked body on the internet

Four years ago, I did my first-ever naked photo shoot. I was involved in circus arts at the time. The photos were stunning, but I didn’t post them anywhere (even censored versions). I didn’t want anyone to know I had done a nude shoot, and mostly, I thought people would think I was just looking for attention by putting them up on the Internet. It