The masculine penetrates through the genitals. That’s where the feminine receives.
The feminine penetrates through the heart. That’s where the masculine receives.
Forcing a man to open up emotionally before he’s ready can feel similar to a woman being entered before she’s dripping wet and fully ready.
And the lasting effects are the same. I see so many women who are completely disconnected from their pussies because of a lifetime of ignoring their boundaries.
I see so many men who are completely disconnected from their emotions because of a lifetime of being told to keep them hidden.
Women have more intense orgasms and way better sex when they feel completely safe.
Men open up emotionally when they feel safe.
Creating safety and trust in relationships is most important.
Safety is created from presence and patience. Being incredibly present with your partner – noticing their breathing, their energy, their sounds, their smell – keeping your attention fully in that moment. Allowing things to move slowly – both sexually and emotionally.
So many men have been hurt from women who claim that they want men to open up emotionally – but then when a man cries in front of them, they see him as weak and don’t like him anymore.
This is the equivalent of a man saying he wants to have sex with a woman super quickly – then having sex with her and losing interest immediately.
This only happens – in both cases – from people who haven’t done their work.
This is obviously gender-normative. Take from it what most applies to you – you could be a person with a vulva who has a more penetrating (aka “masculine”) sexual energy.
Create safety. Create trust. Cultivate presence. That’s where the magic comes from.