I married a man who values my expression most highly⁣

He values it above family⁣
And friends⁣
And the world stage. ⁣
And his business ⁣
And how it makes him look. ⁣

He does not have preferences about it⁣
He does not need me to dress it up a certain way⁣
He does not need me to tone it down⁣
To cover myself or keep it small⁣

Because his preference IS that I am fully self expressed ⁣

My whole adult life I have valued this thing inside myself most highly⁣

And I have had to hold it in the face of partners⁣
Family members⁣
Public⁣

Who have said things like⁣
Demetra⁣
Did you really have to write that⁣
Did you really need to say that⁣
Did you really have to do it that way⁣
Couldn’t you just edit this⁣
Or not say this⁣
Or change this piece⁣

And I have said No. ⁣

I have held this fiercely. ⁣

Because it is not just my expression⁣
It is the expression of this energy that moves through me⁣
And on some level I have always known that without serving that⁣
I would die⁣

I would give up everything for it. ⁣
And that has always been mine to carry alone⁣
To bear the consequences of alone. ⁣

Until I met a man who is so devoted to this. ⁣
That he holds it for me,⁣
Mirrors back my fierceness of it to me⁣
When I have moments when I question, or falter⁣

This thing is bigger than both of us⁣
And we have always known this⁣
That together we are serving something so much greater than ourselves⁣

There is no sentence that holds more weight in our household than “I am writing.”⁣

Nothing stops the other person in their tracks faster, makes an interruption less necessary. ⁣
We will cut each other off mid sentence to say wait I have to write something down. ⁣
We will have a romantic evening planned together but one of us has something that has to come through and that comes first. ⁣
It would look rude from the outside, probably, this abrupt, shhhh. ⁣
But we both understand it immediately.

He has seen it in me always ⁣
Even before we started dating⁣
When I wrote “shameless” in period blood on my thigh⁣
And the internet freaked out⁣
And he was like. This is art. This is amazing. ⁣

He stands for my highest truth. ⁣
My fullest expression. ⁣
No exceptions, and no need to consider anyone or anything else. ⁣

And together in that we are a team⁣
The power that moves through us both⁣
United as a couple ⁣
To gift our expressions, this energy, to the world. ⁣

To have a man who values this is everything. ⁣

 

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