this photo was taken in June.

Hi loves!

My food journey has turned into something bigger than I could ever have imagined (honestly, I thought I was just going to write the first article and be done with it, lol – but that has not been the case!)

And I have been updating about it wherever I’ve felt like it – that means there are pieces on IGTV, website writing, Instagram stories, podcast episodes, and more… which are probably pretty hard to keep track of for anybody but me.

So I’ve decided to put everything here in one easy-to-access piece. I’ll come back and update this every so often, so that everything is linked from here.

The only thing that won’t be quite in chronological order with the rest are my Instagram story highlights (because obviously those have an order of their own).

If you feel overwhelmed by all of this I suggest just slowly going in order – or just choosing what pulls you most.

xo

****PLEASE NOTE!!!*** as of April 2022 my Instagram has been banned (again). I still have backups of all the IG material listed here, it will just take me some time to upload it elsewhere.

Links:

My Instagram – there is currently “food journey,” “food j 2,” “food j 3,” “food j 4” all the way through 7 in the story highlights.

April 2021

(I began this process in early March, but didn’t start talking about it til April)

Running on empty (writing – not officially part of it but still related)

Food & ice cream & weight gain & nourishment (writing – the beginning)

A new journey of nourishing my body (podcast episode)

Emotions around this food journey (video – IGTV)

May

Gaining weight: the first two months, going shopping (writing)

Healing my inner teenager & being hungry before bed (writing)

What Jordan thinks about my weight gain (video – IGTV)

Feeling like I “ruined” my body & having more than enough (writing)

A deeper update on my weight gain – gained 26 lbs (podcast episode)

Donuts & doritos & crossing 160: going “out of control” (writing)

Watch me eat 5 desserts (video – IGTV – this is one of my favorites!)

More dessert eating (video – IGTV – another cute favorite)

June

Cooking pasta & 5 mins of Jordan & me eating (video – IGTV)

I’ve gained 30 lbs – feeding myself fully & trusting my hunger (writing)

This body wants sex (writing)

The milk binge & do I have an eating disorder? (podcast episode)

Trip to the normal grocery store & what I got (video – IGTV)

Truly going All In: normal grocery stores, processed food, & up 40 lbs (writing)

July

Up 53 lbs, orthorexia recovery, going fully All In (podcast episode)

The hardest parts about this process – a real update of where I’m at (writing)

August

Sad celebration of the life of my past self (writing) Aug 1

The first time I finally felt full – crying while eating a burger (writing + video) Aug 3

The journey of eating more has been long and slow (writing) Aug 11

When my hair stopped falling out (IG post)

Eating food & answering your questions (at 200 lbs & walking out on a dietitian) (video – IGTV)

September

2019 vs 2021 (photo comparison before & after eating)

I have never owned shorts like this in my life (writing)

What Jordan thinks about me gaining 75+ lbs (Part 1) (video – IGTV)

What Jordan thinks about me gaining 75+ lbs (Part 2) (video – IGTV)

December

Giving my human everything she wants (podcast)

January

How I am thinking about food lately – what I’m buying, cooking, growing, and almost a year into ED recovery (podcast)

February

This body will birth babies (writing)

I do not miss being skinny (writing)

I did not know I was restricting food (writing)

March

A Transmission around Weight, how our bodies change, and what we make it mean about us (podcast)

April

How food became neutral to me (writing)

We got married! And bought part of a cow, finding local food, what my body craves, & my Instagram getting banned (podcast)

Our minds do not know better than our bodies (writing)

her belly left the room (poem)

May

Moving my body in a feminine-oriented way, returning to “exercise” again after a two year break, unwinding conditioning around exercise (podcast)

Stepping on the scale for the first time in 6 months & where I’m at now with food & nourishment (full recovery) (writing)

 

Resources

These are people I’ve learned from along the way, in case you want to explore. They are in order of which has been most helpful to me.

Tabitha Farrar (ed recovery & genetic component)

The Fuck It Diet 

Health At Every Size (I haven’t finished this yet but feel it should be named)

Dr. Jennifer Gaudiani

Nicola Rinaldi (if you’ve lost your period, which I didn’t)

Kayla Rose, Damn the Diets

Stephanie Buttermore’s All In journey – this was helpful for me at the beginning in encouraging me to eat more. but in retrospect I don’t think she had an eating disorder (in the same way – def had disordered eating)

Resources around intentionally nourishing, which comes much much later (the way I started and eat more similarly to now)

Jessica Ash – I do not recommend unless you have healed your issues with food/weight

 

 

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