The eroticism of being seen

Being seen is deeply terrifying. ⁣ ⁣ And it’s also fucking hot. ⁣ ⁣ And what we sometimes miss in the desire to be seen is that the appeal of it actually comes from your willingness to feel all of the sensations. ⁣ ⁣ Terror included. ⁣ ⁣ We LOVE feeling terror. ⁣ ⁣ There is something so tingly, so exciting, so ALIVE about letting

Watch the stories your mind creates

This morning, Jordan and I were getting ready to go on vacation (a covid-safe trip, to his family’s house on the coast). He left to pick up our rental car. I was in a fantastic mood, cleaning the house, getting everything ready to leave. When Jordan came back, he was quiet. He didn’t give me much attention. I knew he hadn’t eaten yet, that he

Feeling and naming your full desire: Jordan pays for our lives & this is what that looks like

Earlier this year, I was lying on the grass, headphones in, listening to one of my teachers talk about feeling your full desire. She mentioned how when we don’t express 100% of our desire to someone, we rob them of the ability to feel 100% of our appreciation. I thought about how I owed Jordan money. How I was “supposed” to feel so grateful to

The exact practice I do every week to strengthen my relationship: creating a relationship ritual

— WOUND is now open for registration. Every time I mention that Jordan and I have a weekly relationship ritual, everybody wants to know exactly what we do and exactly how to do it. Having a relationship ritual is the absolute number-one thing I recommend for the health of your relationship. It has been such a game-changer in our relationship; I honestly think it’s more

I softened into my feminine & attracted the most incredible partner

Jordan is kind to me. When I forget to turn off the stove, he smiles and turns it off himself. When I am making us late, he calmly changes plans so we are not late. Every single morning, I come out of the bedroom, and he immediately stops what he’s doing, closes his computer and puts it to the side, giving me his full presence

If you think you have to “train” men, this is for you

If you think you have to “train” men If you feel glee when you “put him in his place” You will continually end up with men who are submissive to you. Who cast down their eyes when you get angry Who say “I don’t know, what do you think?” to every problem that arises Who shut down when you ask them to speak Who cannot

8 Ways to Increase Your Desire for Sex

If you’ve been with your partner for a while, you might find yourself desiring sex less often. Maybe you’re just super stressed, really busy, or you’ve been spending too much time with your partner… or maybe none of those things are true, but you’re still feeling the lack of desire. Even if you’re single, you might feel like “Hey, where’d my sexual self go?! I

Making fun of each other is criticism, and criticism is not love

In my family, we showed our love for one another by making fun of one another. We bonded over making fun of one another. In fact, I learned that “being easy to make fun of” was one of my top-valued qualities. My family told me that my voice was too squeaky and annoying. That I was forgetful and irresponsible. That I was ditzy and “blonde.”

11 Ways to Increase Your Feminine Energy (and What’s Blocking You From It)

Do you feel like it’s hard for you to drop into your feminine, or like you don’t really know what that means? If so, you aren’t alone. Most women that I talk to feel this way. Our culture rewards masculine energy. We’re encouraged to work hard, get the promotions, sacrifice our pleasure and our needs, sculpt our bodies, and be upfront and direct with what

What the life of two sex & relationship coaches is really like under quarantine

Jordan and I started quarantining during the third week of March. The weekend before everyone started staying in their homes, we went out to dinner. “Right, we’re not supposed to do that,” the waiter said, winking, as he held out his hand to shake, and Jordan took it and I didn’t. Two days after that, it was like an entirely different world. My friends had